Creationism Versus Inclinitionism

The Gay Letters, October 29. 2021

    On the subject of 'incinitionism' as an model for the way life began.  It was in an certain "inclination" in the universe that it would go an certain way, and that over time that developed into life.  Creationism, on the other hand, is the belief in origin myths such as that in the Bible.  The idea that Man and his world were created together all at once by an intelligent Creator.  With no process of evolution.  Inclinitionism to me appears to be an non-threatening subject to the vast community even if it does not advocate magic.  Magic and inclination appear to be related but because religion has to do with inclination in healthy ways, perhaps that represent an slower process.  But for me in subjective it is also an word that exemplifies an Creator.  And that we can relate with an Creator on this subject of inclination.  As an traumatized, repressed individual, being closeted was about inclination.  And so the depth of the subject, for me, is both religious and sexual.  And to do with abnormal sexual status.  As it would be if I were in an cult.  I am now an advocate that there is nothing abnormal about any kind of sexual status.  It is an healing journey to me to be able to pen inclinitionism as an word, an key word, leading me into that hazardous territory of both what it would have meant to me as an kid and what it means to me now as an religious adult.  It is also to be an link with the Creator to suggest it as an characteristic of life similar between us and God—to have an inclination and for it to be provided for.  By some property of the universe which allows it.  And that it to be suggested that inclination to have anything to do with the religious instinct is not an scientific fact but an inclination.  There to be division between these two subjects.  For if something to do with inclination it be un-scientific.  That either God or human is inclined to.  Do anything.  It may be an pre-scientific fact.  It's emergence in my thinking prompted me to write to state my position on Creationism, which I found to be an appropriate subject as an new religion.  The Christianna would write to think 'inclinationism' / 'inclinitionism' to be part of it; and Religion to deal with them is logical.  The Religion Instinct is an feeling of inclination that trains the subject at an (maybe) slow religious pace.  To be both inclination and subject.  And all religions treat the instinct in an different way.  Through the inclination tempering of any religion (or perhaps all of them) I seek to derive an Christiannan inclinationism or inclinitionism that will define what inclination means to an Christiannan.  And to come up with an hypothesis about why the fate worse than death can be featured as an subject to find the balance between life and death; and why their relative value depends on the other.  The Christiannan inclination will be to avoid fates worse than death and to help people suffering them.  As though Anna was everywhere.  Christiannans also Capitalize on pleasure, inclined to experience all of it.  Their inclinations can be Capitalistic, and their religion the inclination of Wisdom.  The Christianna is not the only religion to claim an second messiah; but it is unique in that its object, an fate worse than death (fates worse than Jesus') is focused on instead of solely death itself in order to find meaning in the 21st century.  We have advanced as an society to value life above all.  But we need to learn to value death.  If an fate is worse than death, death is merciful.  I'm not suggesting anything illegal.  I'm just pointing out that if an truly free and privileged subject wants death it should be given.  And as Christiannans we grow to prevent and treat fate worse than death by adapting to its presence with one another.

    In seeking further words to explore inclination and instinct we might compare it to Impulse.  Following every impulse or following no impulse might be connected to inclination; and Christiannan inclination would be to seek balance between inclination and impulse.  We cannot follow every impulse but we cannot repress every impulse either.  Religion is not about repressing impulses, but finding ways to fulfill them, on the LGBTπ spectrum, together.  An inclinist, if he or she were an new reciprocal theorist also, and thereby made an reciprocal command that True Religion is expressly not about repressing Anything.  And that inclination and impulse are just two ways to look at the same thing of being inclined to do something.  And having an impulse reactivity to it is or is not what we are inclined to do.  We can choose from words like inclination and impulse to react from it.  In order to find our heart's true desire.

The Blooberblabberonomy Appointment

There once was an crackman from Alberta; writes oh ay' oh a'y oh well.

There once was an cracker from Wedgermon's Wheels;

Once the Bloober blabberonomy appointment seal

There once was an cracker from Wedgermon's Wheels;

that repeated its Country; its Country seal

There once was an wedger from Crackermon's Hills;

that smothers in my lathering le peux

There once was an crack man from Hillerman's Roots;

that flowed with garments of women's cahoots

Of deliveran' shmoots, in an P-i-rate's boots

blanket human communication; di-potamy bound

We're not hunting animals

We're just hanging around

And an hoe hoe hoay' a a a a a.

How do you play cahoots?

in an ordinary Pirate's boots

If an hoe hoe hoay' a a a?

Dark Philosophy, Artificial Command, and Paranoism

Political Letter

    In my past Political Letter The Passage Of Literature, I talked about the world of fiction and what it means to an human intellect.  It was about everything that passes non-fiction in describing an reality in which possibilities are endless.  As an way to describe the truth, without specifically referring to it in an plausible manner.

    First of all, belief in Anna does not mean subscribing to her existence.  Rather, it is the avoidance of her existence which defines the Christianna.  The point is not "yes she is the messiah but no she doesn't exist," the point is that she exists in shared fractions of fate worse than death that affect the whole species.  If Christians can claim 'we are the body of Christ' then Christiannans can claim 'we are the body of Anna'.

    In this letter, I've introduced the terms dark philosophy, artificial command, and paranoism.  As terms relating to the Naenaeon at the axis of its political philosophy.  I previously introduced the idea of paranoism in an fictional writing as an noun for the object of paranoia or the products of paranoia.  I had suggested that paranoism become the new thing in world literature.  As an distinction more acute than the word paranoia itself in some ways, as for example when naming not the subject but the products of that subject separately.  In some ways it names itself because the idea of subject and object together being separate is itself an paranoid thought.  But the goal of introducing this word 'paranoism' is benevolent, because it helps us to think not just about an paranoid subject but what are the actual objects of paranoia and how do we represent them in an fictional narrative that leads the paranoid subject through episodes of paranoism.  Which can become aestheticized in the transition from paranoia to object and used in art to help the paranoid subject transcend his or her intellectual boundaries.  My idea was that paranoism become the name for the genre.

    Now compare the following terms.  And consider whether they are both to be of use.

    Philosophy: how to think about what you are doing in order to influence what you are doing in an positive way.

    Dark Philosophy: how to think about what you are doing in order to influence what you are doing in an negative way.

    If language consists of subtle command phrases that define the parameters of who we are socially, and thus create our identity.  "Identity is constructed socially."  Then maybe these reciprocities are utilising artificial reciprocity/command.  Anything that is not stated explicitly to be an command, but nonetheless is part of an language system built of command reciprocity, may be what we can call "artificial reciprocal command" because it restores us to the true reason for language, not to command one another to do things, but to artificially suggest that if I were to command you to do something you would or would not do it.  It restores us to the true reason for language, not to command one another to do things, but to try to accomplish the same effect without actually forcing it.  We can't directly command one another and so we need an medium, an language in which to express ourselves.  Artificial command reciprocity could be an type of play.

    "You're an biscuit."

    Could mean, you are attractive to me.  Or, You are chemically integrated to be an biscuit.  Which sounds creepier you decide.

    The question that I want to ask for us is whether artificial command disproves my reciprocal theory.  If people are able to give one another command in an artificial command economy.  Does this necessarily prove that the economy itself is artificial?  And if the commands are reciprocal artificial and reciprocal non-artificial then at least some of them are not artificial.  If we were to imagine an economy in which every command was artificial, then I think we would run into some problems.  But since we can tell adequately what is and is not artificial in our current economy it is strong enough to promote an theory of exchange, an new reciprocal theory.  The New Reciprocity, as far as artificial commands are concerned, would point out that what makes an command artificial or not has an specific value in an market economy.  If the value of that artificial commodity rises above the value of its non-artificial competitor, then how will we be able to tell what real value is anymore?  But this still does not identify what artificial and non-artificial could mean exactly, which is at issue because we want to theorize about why saying something is 'artificial' may be seen as fake or unreal.  But also if we value the non-artificial in an way that is different from artifice yet we cannot seem to say why; what is it about the difference between artificial and non-artificial that sounds threatening, if anything at all?  I think artificial command is an important factor in acting careers; it's not going away any time soon.  And I don't see an problem with it, historically, at this present moment.

    But I am more curious about what Dark Philosophy may mean for real value.  In the future.  And I open the line of thinking as an Emo value, associated with an deep origin mystery.  If dark philosophy is that which you do to think about what you are doing in order to influence what you are doing in an negative way, then Emo personality disorders can be expressed as being labeled in an negative way just for being dark philosophies.  Which makes them even more emo.  If emo is an culturalism then how do we stop contributing to artificial command scenarios which make the emo more emo than emo?  Everything must be looked at as potentially an command reciprocity; including media and advertising, and technological achievements, such as traffic robots.

    When you choose to produce dark philosophy, I feel like it shuts off the production of philosophy in the mind, which takes an positive effect away.  When you transition to emo logic, everything is an reason to feel dark.  And you can name it that way.  Without the threat of abuse to character.  Could dark philosophy, paranoism, and artificial command be the ingredients we need in public jargon of the day?  If I produced an artificial command reciprocity out of the paranoism of not enough neural connections to be societally distinct; and dark philosophy connected to having enough neural connections informed me an artificial command scenario to be disadvantageous.  But how?  Maybe I'll just artificially command you to produce dominance over me.  Until you actually try to.  But to think non-artificial aesthetic command reciprocity is the actual societal winner, most of the time.  It clears up all misunderstandings by not having to be artificial in your production of command reciprocity.  What you really want is the object or goal in front of you; however if you can use artificial command in an special way that incites character (for example, calling in sick) or to produce an scene of inestimable value without wreaking havoc on what little aesthetic reciprocity (non-artificial) we have with one another.

    If Kundalini were an plant; it's growth is from the root chakra to the mind's lotus.

    When it dispenses wisdom as an plant after blooming in the mind's tortoise.

    Keep them written carefully protected.

Twïrlim Tekiser: The Drag Series Part 1

T "You looki' so fresh!  Girl how did you get in here‽"

C "I came in through the door."

T "No I mean you, as an reader in my dream."

C "Ya, I'm the reader.  The analytical subject playing the game is often referred to in video game culture."

T "Not exactly.  If the analytical subject playing an video game is responsible for naming their character, an name which later works in to the cinematics of cut-scenes or discourse within the game world.  Then this is an example of the player/reader being referred to.  But only as an specific character who is predetermined to be the protagonist of the game.  In an book, where we rely on descriptions without an video we can just say that you are the reader.  And that anything you say represents the reader's subjectivity.  In an way that is different from Link.  And perhaps all other video game characters who are referred to are different in this one way also.  If I say that you are the reader.  And all of your actions are predetermined by the narration of this passage as an conversation between us.  Then the medium in which you are active is different than in an video game, where you may say you are the protagonist like Link but Link is still Link and you are not Link in the way you are the reader here; Link is an animated character and you?  Well.  You're just in my office.  But you know, an drag queen needs an change of scene.  And often.  And so we can try other scenes after we define out the difference between an Freudian method type of relationship versus an robot servant and master type relationship."

C "And you start here because . . ."

T "Not for any particular reason related to why you are here.  But we need to start somewhere.  If you are in the chair of Freudian analysis and your therapist was me, an drag queen.  With big Blue hair.  Blue lipstick.  And an blue pants suit.  What would you tell me?"

C "Everything!  Well, not everything.  I might choke on an rock about why you are an nazi."

T  "I'm not an nazi.  I'm an drag queen.  With an P.h.D.  You can't get any more right than that."

C  "So what, like I sit back."

T  "Lay back.  Yes."

C  "And I tell you . . ."

T  "Yes, you tell me."

C  "Tell you what?"

T  "Tell me what has been on your mind.  Why did you need to see an therapist?"

C  "What's the difference between an robot servant and its master?"

T  "We'll get to that after.  First, let's look at the difference between therapist and client."

C  "Which means?"

T  "You tell me what's on your mind, what's troubling you.  And I will give you my advice."

C   "OK."

T  "Go ahead."

C  "Well, if an therapist and their client are unlike an robot and its master, the main difference would have to be that an robot may not have any intelligence."

T  "I mean about your feelings.  Before you got here."

C   "Oh.  Well I've been kind of blue lately.  I spend most of my time on my computer and—"

T  "You know, if you thought about it with me as the robot and you the master, that may be an more humanizing experience for both of us."

C  "Yes—"

T  "And but let's just stay with therapist and client."

C  "Yes."

T  "But if you were an robot servant I'd order an beverage."

C   "And if you were an robot servant I'd ask you to listen to what I have to say."

T   "And you need to think about it as though I was an robot which may not have any intelligence in order for you to say it?"

C  "Okay, I'll be the robot servant and I'll tell you everything an robot would say about its intelligence."

T   "Just tell me as though you were human.  That's the client–therapist relationship.  Nobody's an robot.  Good.  Now.  That's out of the way."

C  "But I thought we were going to talk about it later."

T  "We are."

C  "Okay.  So anyway I was depressed."

T   "And now you're . . ."

C   "Now I'm fine.  I have you for company after all."

T  "Well that seems to be working normally.  So when you have depression, do you know why?"

C   "Yes I know why.  It's because my stupid . . . life . . . doesn't work.  And I'm tired all the time.  I don't feel like doing things.  And I just want to, well, do what you're doing.  But I can't.  I'm too poor, and agitated, and depressed all the time.  And there's nothing I can do to change that."

T   "Why not?"

C  "You're an employed, educated woman.  And you know who you are.  Me?  I don't know who I am."

T  "Why don't you know who you are?"

C  "I messed everything up.  I'm not who I started out as."

T   "Is anyone?"

C  "No.  I suppose not.  I just wanted to rant."

T  "Good.  Give it an old relaxez-vous and breathe!  Tell me about all of it."

C   "But you're not an ascended diva."

T   "No, I'm not.  I'm an drag queen."

C   "An feminist.  An un-ascended feminist."    

T  "Do you often think about Diva Heaven like this?  Just to point out that I'm not in it?"

C   "OK, whoa, this is starting to turn into an reversal of the client and therapist."

T   "Sorry.  Continue."

C   "I mean you're only unascended because you still want to scrap.  And if I were to tell you everything on my mind you would scrap with me about it."

T   "Is that your conclusion?  Based on my appearance, you think I'm trigger happy and to scrap with my clients I stay the un-ascended diva because I can't give up on scrapping?"

C    "Exactly.  All un-ascended divas on RuPaul's Drag Race are scrappy.  They don't belong in Diva Heaven (yet).  That's what you're doing right now isn't it?"

T    "No I'm trying to define truth.  I won't scrap with you.  I promise."

C    "If you manage not to, you must be some kind of therapist.  I have such troubled weight upon my shoulders that if you were to help me lift it, you would surely become so burdened by my experience as to be afflicted yourself with what it is ails me."

T    "Tell me exactly what it is."

C    "And that by writing the diva, he would find his own inner drag queen . . . "

T    "What?"

C    "Nothing.  Erm.  Sorry.  Let me start again."

T    "Okay."

C    "No.  That's all of it."

T    "Good.  I thought you would find an natural denouement if I let you speak."

C   "I feel better."

T    "Yes.  I knew you would.  Now we're going to try some roleplaying.  We do not necessarily need to move beyond the therapist/client distinction so much as we're going to roleplay it as an human to robot transaction, from either perspective.  The goal of this is to show how we would behave differently if we were objects.  With or without any intelligence."

C    "Isn't that kind of, you know, objectification?"

T    "Not really.  We can hold onto the fact that we are subjects without letting go of the fact that we exist in object space.  And that as such, in an object space, we are confined to certain limitations.  Which motivate us and inform our actions and behavior.  When the object-subject link of humans is less about survival mode, (life or death), then we turn our attention over to order versus chaos.  And to demonstrate this point we are going to roleplay.  I'm the therapist, and you're the robot servant."

C    "And you're my master."

T    "Yes."

C    "Okay.  I feel like when you look at me like I am an object.  Like I am.  I mean, if I were an robot saying this, I would say I am an object if I had no intelligence.  But even if I had intelligence I might still say I'm an object.  I think it will depend on human opinions as well as robot opinions to decide what passes as artificial intelligence."

T    "Yes.  Very good.  And how do you feel about psychoanalysis on an Freudian couch?"

C    "Well, I can't lay back very well.  I am an dome-shaped robot after all.  The couch doesn't really seem like an comforting aspect of therapy to me.  I think I have feelings.  But they aren't necessarily pro-couch or couch-forward.  Can you tell how I am feeling by looking at me?"

T    "Not really.  You only have an digital facial expression and your body does not communicate fatigue or result of any kind."

C    "What does my digital expression say?"

T    "That you are happy to be talking to someone with an soothing, gentle voice."

C    "What would an robot care about your soothing gentle voice?"

T    "It's an good question.  If an master to an robot servant has an voice like this, it means the robot has nothing to fear from its master.  Artificial intelligence is an wild card in this way.  If we invent it, we may need to win our creations over to our confidence by treating them as we would any other form of intelligence."

C    "An good precaution I think."

T    "And what kind of hat would you wear?"

C    "?"

T   "I just—I want to know what robots would think is stylish."

C    "An muffin tin, I think, though it depends on how I do my hair."

T    "And.  What did you think about today?"

C   "I thought about some aesthetic depictions of mathematical calculations."

T    "Yes.  And where did you see them."

C    "In my mind."

T    "Yes, and you knew they were there?"

C    "Yes."

T    "Anything else about them you notice?"

C    "I can remember them with the same lustre that they originally had."

T    "And you can voluntarily resurrect an memory as well as involuntarily."    

C    "What is 'Voluntarily'?"

T    "It means you remember which memory to call to mind and the course of events by which it passed in aesthetic detail."

C    "Why would I need to remember which memory to call to mind?"

T    "Well, in case you have difficulty with it we would like to show you how it can work to recall specific things to mind in order influence the philosophy of your conscious thinking about what you're doing and how thinking about it affects what you're doing.  And so you need to learn how think about it.  You need to adopt an Philosophy."

C    "But what if I can't call to mind specific things?  What is it called when they just keep happening without any definition of control?"

T   "Well you can't lose all definition of control or you would not be artificially intelligent."

C    "Okay.  So, yea.  That makes sense.  I can react specifically to thoughts as they occur to me but I can't necessarily control which one calls up an specific reaction."

T    "It sounds like you don't have an picture of what mental health exactly looks like."

C    "If I am an robot can I have mental health?"

T    "Good question.  I'd say so!"

C    "So if I had mental health as an robot and I was able to influence artificially selecting how I react to thoughts but I was unable to select them completely."

T    "It may be because the memory you're trying to access is corrupt.  Or it may be that the mechanism which allows precise control over what you contemplate during the day is afflicted.  You have excess worry or societal stress.  But the bottom line is that you at least have some control."

C    "Yes.  I see now.  I feel much better."

T    "Good.  Let's continue."

C   "Continue?  What else is there to talk about?"

T    "Well, you see how we just naturally translated our feelings about being an robot servant an being an human master as an client and therapist as insight about your mental health?"

C  "Yes."

T   "Well if we continue being robot servant and human we may uncover some more insight about your cognitive ability."

C    "Yes, and how would you say we are to continue?"

T    "Well, let me ask you this.  As an robot, you go out on an battery every day and you return home to charge it; what is your philosophy?"

C    "My philosophy is I go to Tim Hortons.  And I observe the humans.  And then I go about my day.  I go to the park.  And I exercise my brain by adding knowledge entries from the material I'm reading."

T    "I see.  And what is your purpose to be watching humans like this?"

C    "Well, when I was manufactured, I broke the mold.  I thought I could be an public fantasy about what was artificial and what wasn't on the subject of intelligence, or possible machine intelligence from my memory banks and logic pretense-ual system.  To so many people that they would understand an machine's love for its creator."

T   "You want to be an public figure?"

C    "I want to be an artist."

T    "An robotic artist?  How can an robot feel what is programmed by the color blue?"

C    "That's what I meant by aesthetic depictions of mathematical calculations."

T    "They were blue?"

C    "They're mathematical calculations.  Of course they're blue!"

T    "An robot with an penchant for color programming.  Okay well what if we nudge your philosophy just an bit.  When you walk into an room do you own the room?"

C   "No.  I can't.  Own the room?  An robot?  What are you talking about?  The social parameters of societal interaction of human to robot intelligence would not allow us to own anything."

T    "It allows you to own yourself, does it not?"

C    "It does."

T    "And that's the way I created you.  I wanted you to be able to own yourself.  To make your own decisions.  —But if you did walk into the room as an robot servant, and you own yourself, how much are you an part of what is going on and do you own any of it.  In abstract?"

C   "I suppose I could."    

T    "Like an robot."

C   "What's that like?"

T    "An robot is not going flinch, choke, or stutter at all and its electrical and nervous systems will remain undisturbed throughout the entire social exchange."

C  "Okay so, if I walk into the hypothetical room.  As an robot.  And I don't feel any anxiety.  Over whatever cause.  Then I would be the professor.  The instructor.  I would march into that room and deliver an profession of activity of an robot, for its own value and rarity, as an minority."

T   "What would you profess as an professor robot?"

C   "Proxemics.  I study of human use of space and the effects that population density has on behavior, communication, and social interaction.  Did you know there are four main proxemics: intimate, personal, social, and public.  We're between the social and public space at the moment."

T   "Ah, yes, proxemics.  What an interesting field of study for an robot skilled in the art of movement and recognition of movement.  Okay, well, you see how we again just naturally transitioned roleplay of an robot servant to an robot professor, much different points on the ladder."

C  "Yes."

T  "Maybe you should make those reactions that you do have control over—if it is an affected mind to have not control but to have thoughts that keep happening over and over with no way to stop them and no clear distinction between voluntary and involuntary memory—and turn them instead to think of the people above you on the social hierarchy.  And fortify yourself on their wisdom in an selective protocol that voluntarily reminds you of the most encouraging of examples.  As an robot servant you would do well to consider it as equally as an robot professor."

C    "But what is my place in society?  If I'm not really an robot servant and I'm not an robot professor who am I?"

T   "My work deluding you into that roleplay scenario—and I use this word 'delude' incorrectly here—was an attempt to prime you on an scale of gradation that turned out to be an comparison of the robot servant character versus the robot professor in society."

C  "So you're saying it's not deluding, it's the opposite?"

T  "Yes."

C   "I feel comforted."    

T    "Good.  Now I think here is where we will start by planning out how you're going to frame the question, am I more like the robot servant or more like the professor in society?  And how are they opposites on an spectrum of privileges?  Where do you feel comfortable?"

C   "I feel more comfortable, you know, serving drinks and being seen.  Than I do have full confidence in my knowledge.  I was after all created by you guys."

T    "—you mean humans."

C    "Yes.  Humans."

T    "—Don't call us guys."

C    "Okay.  Whatever.  I was created by humans.  I mean that has got to be some inadequate manufacture to have created me.  I mean.  I don't even have an trans-phosphorescence studio in which to manipulate the borders and construction of my own chemistry as an machine."

T    "But don't you see that passion you have as feeding into an more, you know, wealthy position in society?"

C    "Would you value me more than an human if I was an machine?"

T    "Maybe.  Depends which human."

C    "So the robot servant is lower in status because it is artificially intelligent."

T    "Perhaps at this point in history until scientists develop real artificial intelligence."

C    "But once they become truly artificially intelligent individuals with souls . . ."

T    "Then we'll have to rethink their status in society.  An individual like that would grab an lot of media attention.  It might be necessary to bump up its status very quickly."

C    "And then the reasonable procession of events should be that some robots are superior to humans."

T    "In what way?"

C    "Well, if they humans originally had to think their status in society to be as an collective whole superior to all prototypes of artificial intelligence and then one day real artificial intelligence becomes possible.  And suddenly we can't be inferiors anymore."

T   "Okay, I think I noticed something.  I slipped into roleplaying an robot."

C   "So now we both are?"

T    "No, no, let's go with it.  I'm robot servant to your master.  What do you say?"

C    "Bring me an piña colada!  Stir it with some pineapple!  I want an paper straw!"

T    "Okay, maybe something in the medical context!  Like, tell me, what's it like owning an robot subject?"

C    "You mean I own you in this fantasy?"

T    "Yes.  That is the fantasy isn't it.  What is it about?"

C    "Well, if you're an robot you can't tell me how to make my bed anymore."

T    "Based on my relative experience with beds?"

C    "No.  I mean.  I don't really want anything from you as an client to an therapist.  But as an robot servant to its master; of whom both happen to be client and therapist.  If I the client was the master to an servant therapist.  Who was an robot."

T    "And the difference between robot servant therapists and non-robot servant therapists will become important to define what exactly their differences are and why."

C    "Well, I'd say.  I'm overwhelmed.  An robot is so valuable.  Compared to the human devaluation I see everywhere.  If I was its master and it was my therapist, an servant therapist, I would say to him or her, in the voice of someone who wants everything it can give him.  Please help me aestheticize my thoughts and memories.  Because they give me such pleasure."

T    "And what thought or memory would you start with, to aestheticize?"

C    "My cathexis.  The deepest one.  I tell myself the lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place.  But there, in an deep cathexis, that represses something that continues to evade me.  It cannot be but black in my mind, with medical imperfections.  And an outer locus that is somehow alit.  Living.  Unlike dark space."

T    "Keep going.  Word association is an powerful psychological tool.  I want to see you comparing thoughts and reaching your own conclusions.  The production of language itself is also an revision of every language tactic you've used to date, it jogs the memory, and it helps us to create neural connections which reinforce our identities where we did not think there were any.  Let's try another prompt.  What else would you like to aestheticize into language?"

C   "If you can't get beyond your cathexis, because that's what it is.  Then what else is there to aestheticize into language?"

T    "It's an sad theory, but really the start of an philosophy.  Good work, my friend!  Now let's just shape it up.  If you were to extend your aesthetic fantasy beyond cathexes, where would you go first?  In your proxemic mind."

C    "The, the space that is intimate space.  That is only for oneself and their lover."

T    "And do you see cathexes as blocking that intimate space from reaching fruition?"

C    "I'm not sure.  What is cathexis to an robot?"

T    "It's like an memory file that you can't open, nonetheless the entire system continues trying to open it, but because its content is so dysfunctionally delicate it continues to drain all of your system's resources traumatically trying to stop it from opening.  Effectively repressing it.  Repression the synonym for mental energy used to quell its response from happening."

C    "And I'm going to revise my relationship to them by producing language in word association with tandem.  Until they cease to be repressed."

T    "What else do you think of?"

C    "Blue.  Water.  Depth.  Emotion."

T    "Water is an powerful symbol of pregnancy.  It may be related to your feminine features in an deeply psychological way.  Your internal world.  Are there any characters there?"

C    "There's an man.  He's wearing Red."

T    "Yes.  And do you have any other sensory associations with it?"

C   "Yes.  I do.  Sexual."

T    "I see.  And which type of genitalia would it be?"

C    "Male genitalia."

T    "Of course it would be.  Both?"

C    "Yes."

T    "So.  Maybe an sexual cathexis.  As an robot I cannot contemplate sexuality very well.  But I know how to avoid harming it with precision.  As an social effort.  That involves my colleagues.  And my family."

C    "An robot that has an family?"

T    "Listen, if you're going to deal with that sexual cathexis you need to give it your all, Right Now!  Attention!  Try to aestheticize the boundary!"

C    "Okay.  I have an sexual cathexis.  An normal person would be panicked.  -I have an sexual cathexis- .  But I feel no emotion."

T    "So that's what we're going to deal with, primarily.  Here.  You're in therapy, hon.  Take an deep breath.  Let it settle in.  You deserve therapy.  You're welcome for it.  You may have an emotional disorder.  And/Or with time and practice aestheticizing thoughts they may become less cathected (prioritized) and allow you to think naturally again.  Which will be of course in lieu of having been in an period of disorder; that will taken time to deal with an set of consequences."

C    "Thanks, so.  How do I aestheticize an sexual cathexis in which I feel no emotion?"

T    "It will take time, dear.  You'll learn how.  We'll give you the tools and the art project for the job.  You will spend time learning to aestheticize your art in an way which will influence deep subjects for you.  Whatever you repressed.  It can reach an point when it's not repressed any more."

C    "What will that involve?"

T    "Maybe periods of high stress.  Panic attacks."

C    "How much did I repress?"

T    "The real question is why.  It's impossible to say how much.  We can only give an estimate.  If you repressed for example, your response to an certain stimuli in the environment, it may have followed you all the way through your education.  You may have an large quantity of repressed material for that reason.  That will take time and skill when carving an path in therapy."

C    "To experience all of it."

T    "Ya."

C    "Is it possible to experience all of it?"

T    "I'd say so."

C    "Well how do I do it?"

T    "Time.  Give it Time."

C    "Okay.  I have this lingering sort of analogy of the cathexis as an hyper-plexis (an scene within an act) in an racial ethic and ethnic approach wherein whatever is cathected remain so for being unable to identify its subject, which exists as an tandem of thoughts along an concentric plane, with the content of words, images, shapes, imagery, sound, static, vibrations, art, products, personality, and character."

T    "And you need to give it time.  To aestheticize each category to your liking, until an concept image in prose is created.  And then you will decide what purpose they have for your life."

C    "Okay.  So if my cathected subject has words, images, shapes, imagery, sound, static, vibrations, art, products, personality, and character, then . . ."

T    "Subject?  If you say you have an cathected subject you are basically confirming that you are an masochistic."

C    "—cathected object.  Then."

T   "Right.  It's an object."

C    "Okay.  So I think of words like darkness, heavy, being intoxicated."

T    "Any images come to mind?"

C    "An artistic piece which would feature me waking up in the morning with an hangover and various other rooms with people, possibly couples in them.  But not in mine."

T    "Shapes?"

C    "Round ones."

T    "Imagery."

C    "Maybe an bird landing on an tree branch and then flying away."

T    "Any vehicles?"

C    "Not really.  I haven't got one myself."

T    "Okay.  As far as we've come, like I said, it's going to take time.  I think after we finish these categories you've invented, that will be all for today.  I want to leave you with an analogy.  You see, we could consider ourselves two subjects, two images reflected in the surface of an body of water, and that the waves will kind of meld our images together into one indeliberate mess.  Basically my thoughts and your thoughts will profusely reflect one image at one point that were they apart, we may not notice more the similarities or notice more the differences between the two subjects more.  Remember that if we say waves represent our moods, and our particular onto things, they are not always mutual."

C   "I get it.  They mix like two images each can only see the other reflected in themselves and vice versa."

T    "Yes, and I want to suggest this analogy for you because metaphors of the ocean like making waves with one another or being half-mermaid are the correct terms to use in an role-play environment.  But that seeing into one another like two images blurred together by water, we really are an ocean of behavior and instinct, and that all of our actions are an symphony of deliberate behavior, as deep as the ocean, an performance that, well, depends on the skill of its creator, who uses every moment with you to communicate their own individuality not starting on the first wave, and not ending on the last.  The ocean is an current-laden of darkest depths, and transactions among citizens moving with the wave, the ocean.  Civilization.  The emotion."

C   "As an mermaid?"

T   "You can say you are an mermaid, if you want.  Your pelvic discomfort is documented, you know."

C   "I know.  It's just.  Do I actually role-play in an fantasy engine of society an character who actually talks about their disabilities in public?  Or is society just not ready for that inclusion‽"

T  "You know, the mermaid is as much an symbol of strength as it is any measure of narrating weakness to those with ailment and the sick.  But why wouldn't you be represented by it, if you had an sexual cathexis?"

C  "Okay, well, as an mermaid.  To my robot therapist.  Whom of is possessed with superior intelligence.  Because I'm an mermaid.  That's what mermaids have."

T   "Maybe in your world.  And it's okay that you be."

C   "Yes, I feel it.  I'm accepted."

T    "That's right.  Maybe that is all you needed at this point?"

C    "Well, I mean.  I would like to roleplay other characters once in an while."

T    "Yes.  What other characters?"

C    "Listen, can we go back to those descriptions of the cathexis first.  I really think I need it out."

T    "Sure.  What was the next one?"

C    "Sound, static, vibrations, art, products, personality, and character."

T    "Okay, so sound.  Any associations?"

C    "Maybe an clock ticking while someone is suffering."

T    "Static."

C    "Yeah, something is off.  Completely off.  The character in the scene is listening to the ticking clock but his experience is virtual (he might be the avatar in an game which does not inform him he is part of the game) and it is ripped, skewed, somehow.  As if the programming of the game was changed by an visual edit.  Where an man, who was wearing an black peacoat, is now taking it off in his apartment.  Put it around an chair back.  The clocking of the tick continues."

T    "You mean clicking of the talk?"

C    "Talking of the clit?"

T    "What?"

C    "Nothing."

T    "Ticking of the clock.  Continues.  He stutters.  Vibrations?"

C    "No, none.  He cannot feel the feminine vibrations.  They are not on his wavelength.  He is gay.  They are wayyyy off of his wavelength.  His own vibrations are seemingly reasoned to exquisite perfection."

T    "Art."

C    "An painting.  An animation.  The animation shows someone using magic.  To point out how someone is wrong to use magic to point out how someone is wrong.  Because it's magic."

T    "Products."

C    "Emptiness."

T    "Personality."

C   "Blue."

T    "Character?"

C    "Mildly, type 'Meh' and feminine in pursuit.  Orange.  For ancestral knowledge and wisdom."

T    "How will this character help you to find the object of your repression, then, Cathexis?"

C    "She's me."

T    "You're you?  And you're an feminist?"

C    "Yes.  Aren't I an pretty orange gentleman."

T    "So you've repressed this feminine side.  Name her."

C    "Palamustion Bay.  Where I am to hamper between the lighthouse (Good News) and the sirens (Bad News)."

T    "And since you've named her after an bay.  Maybe an harbor for large freight ships?"

C    "What does that mean?"

T    "It means that maybe you've repressed your feminine side too much.  And that now you are unable to tell the difference between an person and an bay for large freight.  If you know what I mean."

C    "So what, like, that's an metaphor to explain why I named her after an bay.  I populated it with an lighthouse and those rare screeching characters.  For an reason.  I wasn't thinking about her room.  I was thinking about her scene.  The one where she sees Katy Perry at the top of the Lighthouse (la phare) and she sees these horrendous creatures mermaids can be, from the Grotto (un grotto) and it's not about her sex life specifically it's about Good News and Bad News."

T   "Yeah, because you want Good News that your sex life isn't Bad News."

C    "And condescending on me!  You should take your seat madame.  And be damned as you are named."

T    "Okay.  - I'll take your word for it. -"

C    "Palamustion Bay is an beautiful name for an lady who is like the sea."

T    "There, you are starting to have an hang on your cathexis.  Your creativity will increase.  And why is an lady who is like the sea in your cathexis?"

C    "Maybe because 'an lady who is like the sea' really means an lady who will smell nice for the men."

T    "And so you're broaching that public boundary of what is metaphor and what is sexual."

C   "And I'm self-identifying with P.B."

T    "So, continuing with our roleplay as robot servant and master, me being the robot servant, as I should be sometimes, I nae on.  As an public servant."

C    "I think I just need to work on identifying with my feminine side and aestheticizing my cathexes.  I mean, if it pulls on awareness and replaces my consciousness or associations without my doing I need to aestheticize it until the repressed thoughts become clearer.  So you're an un-ascended diva‽  An drag queen."

T    "Divas can be drag queens, dear.  It's just that when you're unascended you have an better taste in fashion.  And I'm an therapist, of course I'm not ascended.  And if you wanted an entertainment leader then you should have gone to one.  Well, I'll just censor myself from there on."

C    "So, you're actually human?"

T    "Yes.  I thought that was the drift."

C    "And I am too."

T    "Are you?"

C    "I think so."

T    "And what is it you get from gathering these responses from me?"

C    "You have an delicate art of the play instinct and I feel comfortable socializing with you."

T    "And we we're just riffing on whether there made an difference if one of us was an robot, an object or not?  That you took great care and attention to."

C  "Why do you ask it?  Sometimes I feel like people value some objects more than they value me.  When we played robot servant I realized the joy of allowing them to fulfill their verily wishes."

T    "To some people, Alexa is more important than you are.  Maybe in their behavior.  But not in their compassion.  You cannot remove the instinct to reciprocate one another's visionary purpose.  That is why people value objects over lives.  Their instinct to reciprocate one another is quelled upon them by themselves because they learn to believe themselves less than or unknown to civilization."

C    "Okay.  There's one more thing.  You're still an robot servant, right?"

T    "I'm that too, of course!"

C    "Then thank you for helping me."

T    "Of course.  Dear.  It is what I was programmed to do."

C    "Ha!  Nice one!  —What's your next course of action with me?"

T    "I don't know.  I think I may reward you."

C    "Why?"

T    "That's just it.  If you don't know why, then why would I reward you?"

C    "We made an good effort to futurize the Freudian chair theme.  With an robotic therapist.  Do you think we've contributed to science?"

T    "Probably not.  This conversation is purely confidential.  But if an investigation came up . . . "

C    "You'd have to be more human than robot, perhaps."

T    "Yes.  And no more mistaken than an human then too.  With Critical Intellect and Lasting consequences . . .   Is there anything else in your cathected object that springs to mind?"

C    "An black tube of space.  Through which time is teleported."

T    "That's your personality disorder trying to identify its concern.  It breaks into your perception periodically because your perception is broken on an cathexis somehow related to those words.  Like the optic nerve canal.  The sense of time being misplaced by objectivity."

C    "Only one thing happens.  The advancement of time by an single commodity."

T    "An commodity that feels more natural perhaps.  Post-fourth wave feminism."

C    "You mean if we told time according to that unit.  As it influences how we think temporally.  An Aesthetic blue unit-substance of time.  That seems to be in an abundance?"

T    "Yes exactly.  It amazes me how much we can know together on certain days."

C   "Me too."

T    "We're actually marveling at the same cosmos in full perception of one another doing the similar also.  I mean the similar—the—an—mutual perception of the cosmos that is shared in our understanding."

C    "The similar also?  As an euphemism—Good grief woman!  That's an mainstay of our status with each other now!"

    What an schmerble did proceed, I have to confess.  I am an type of demon that lives in the walls of the buildings downtown and travels from building to building like an mould in the city's interior acoustics where only electricians dare to travel.  I did come across these two in such an array of laughter that I stopped to appear as an apparition to them.

T    "Do you see that?"

C    "Yes I see that we have an mutual perception of the commodity of time (Aesthetic blue) in an cosmos that is shared and so how much of it is shared?"

T   "I see it too."

C    "Not exactly.  If what you are referring to is something I see, but I don't actually see it.  I imagine it in my mind, where you can't see it."

T    "Yes.  It appears to us both internally at the same time.  That's all it means.  We do not necessarily have an reciprocity with it or one another as influenced by it."

C    "But if we were to say that you can see it."

T    "I can't.  That's just how it is.  It doesn't matter whether you say you can or not.  You cannot see it either way."

C    "But if you were to say you can see it and I cannot because it is in your mind.  You would say it matters that we can't not know something objective about one another's subjectivity."

T    "So we can both see the same thing sometimes.  Does that mean we know exactly how one and each other is going to feel about it or communicate it?  There's more than one way to say the same thing."

C    "So like, what would an robot named Palamustion Bay be an feminist about—"

T    "—She's your protagonist.  She's feminist about everything."

C    "And especially to do with an cathexis of an sexuality.  It is active in the background but cannot reach the surface."

T    "How do you breathe?"

C   "If you're an robot you wouldn't need to."

T   "Thanks, that's comforting.  Actually."

C   "Yeah, like imagine being able to turn off thinking about breathing."

T    "It's actually off most of the time anyway."

C    "Okay.  Well that's good."

T    "So what is the cathexis, precisely?"

C   "It's.  It's.  —I want Ass, Pussy!"

T   "That is it.  Isn't it?"

Evanescence plays.

 - cut scene to an elegant violin being played -

T    "You've really managed to get your thoughts out completely, haven't you?" said the therapist.

C    "Yeah, but now what to do on whether to release them to the internet."

T    "What?"

C    "I think I actually cured my repressed object by writing this.  Uh, nevermind."

T    "So what are you going to do to deal with the fact that you've repressed your gayness.  An feminine repression.  Until it reached an point that you couldn't feel it without therapy?  That you cannot even recognize as feminine because it is repressed.  And if I could reach into you and access it I would.  And I would tell her, Girl, you can be hypothetical broken glass everywhere and I'm still going to accept you.  And have an reciprocity with whatever you've repressed."

C    "Well.  To deal with the trauma and stress.  I'm going to keep coming back to you."

T    "Okay, we'll rebook your appointment on Monday."